June 2, 2009
Fail
I broke up with the June LSAT. After ordering books and paying non-refundable test fees and taking practice test after practice test my scores continued to drop. In no particular, logical order. Each section took a turn of reducing its score. And I, faced with a final few weeks in Maine, business travel, moving my life into a POD, and trying not to ruin my chances of transferring if I choose to do so told the June 2009 LSAT to pound sand.
It was a difficult decision. I don’t like to fail. I don’t like to give up. And I wanted (want?) Tulane, but I don’t think a similar or slightly higher LSAT score is going to get me into the Big Easy. The second I mailed a letter to Tulane explaining my upcoming “absence” mark (did I mention that I made this decision three days after the cancel deadline?) for June 8th I felt a weight lift. I packed up my prep tests, books, and guides and shipped them off to a work acquaintance for her use for the October test. I shipped them via my work FedEx account. She’s a client. I plan to push moral and dress code boundaries until the last day here.
So we move forward with Boston. Find apartments. Buy school t-shirts. Ditch my number twos for a few months, and get ready for change.
April 23, 2009
Oy
Waitlisted, with “excellent chance” scores. Reason? They’re full.
Round 2 of the LSAT? Apparently in June.
Rolling admissions takes on another term entirely.
April 22, 2009
Nola
There have been several examples of instigated change in my life over the past five years. Each one of them involves men, and each one of them involves New Orleans.
I work in the commercial maritime industry. Most of our companies thrive on the Gulf, and many of our clients and staff live in and around New Orleans, and we put on our largest tradeshow of the year there in December. In late August 2005 I had been working here for three months, trying to find my way professionally and personally after breaking off a long term relationship and diving headfirst into a summer of partying. As Katrina gathered steam my coworkers and I sat glued to our phones and Internet updates. We know what happened next. The city was broken.
I sought comfort in a friend who had been blatant in his declarations that I was his dream girl. It was the easy way out, and I took it. We spent little time apart after that, and quickly bought our first house together and were engaged by the following August. A moment of weakness on my part, years of settling to muster. Life moved along, and the company brought the show back to NOLA in 2006 when the stigma of the convention center began to lift.
In 2006 I had a new titanium plate and eight screws in my wrist, a giant engagement ring, and a dwindling supply of pain medications. I fell in love with the city, as damaged as it remained, and let the music and flavors and people lift a vicodin haze for a few days. When I returned home there was cancer and weddings to cancel and re-plan and life to attempt to live.
In 2007 I returned to the Crescent City with a wedding band, confidence in my career, and a failing marriage. I met M and his friends (the heads of his company) and we somehow turned one boat ride into three nights of ridiculous debauchery on Bourbon St. I’ve never been out that late. I’ve never had that much fun. And I felt free for the first time since August 30th2005. These intelligent, fun, good-looking guys WANTED to hang out with me. I had forgotten what that might be like. Absolutely nothing romantic or inappropriate happened, and I was grateful for new friends. A round of emails followed and we kept in touch while my husband and I began to work out the details of our separation and subsequent divorce.
This year I returned to New Orleans for what looks to be my final show there. M and I had started emailing again, and I wondered if I might see him there. We hadn’t really gotten closure after my run-away last spring and I didn’t know what might go down. We visited the same restaurants but stayed out of the bars.
I took my LSAT in New Orleans. My first choice school (now that the dust has settled) is in New Orleans. And if by some miracle of overlooking Tulane’s terrible admissions cycle this year I get in, I’ll be starting another chapter of my life there. And if not? I hope somebody is taking me there for Mardi Gras/my birthday next year…
January 20, 2009
Oh… um, hi there…
I’m still alive and I still have the ability to type. Sorry for the absence. Things have been both wonderful and awful over the past… however long it’s been. Let’s hope this is the final “catch-up” post for a bit and that I’ll return to regularly scheduled blogging. Tomorrow.
Yes, I have a boyfriend. Here are some boyfriend bullet points so we’re all familar with the situation and I can commence complaining about him in what I’m certain will be short order:
- He’s the guy from The Thin Line
- He is not “on paper” guy. Not my traditional physical type, he cries when he’s sad (male emotions what??), etc etc etc. However, “on paper” guy usually ends up leaving me hurt and with a UTI
- He is brilliant. I find the way his mind works fascinating. It’s like a machine
- His parents already hate me based on the facts presented in The Thin Line and the fact that I am not Jewish
- He buys beautiful gifts
- He calls every night from Israel
- Which is even further away from his usual home base in Florida
- I’m smitten
Ok, gross, enough, right?
My applications to law school are in. Because of the previously mentioned LSAT score (which will now be referred to as “there-must-have-been-some-mistake“) I have no shot in hell of getting into my original top choices but made a nice list of second tier schools that I believe would make me very happy. Three months until I’ll hear anything.
Which means it tax and fafsa time! So, please stand by for what I believe will be some thrilling posts on my mathematical retardedness and my relationship. There’s nothing more exciting than following a blogger as she descends into monogamous boredom and tries to file paperwork.
December 29, 2008
Random Ten Monday
What I’ve done today:
10. Landed in Portland after a week in CA
9. Checked the LSAC website
8. Picked up Izzi
7. Work by 7:30
6. Bikini wax
5. Rechecked LSAC website
4. Googled anything related to when scores may be released
3. Checked LSAC website
2. Made plans for dinner while wondering if I’ll go if I have bombed the LSAT
1. Complained consistently to M about lack of LSAT scores and was reminded that even if I get a good score then I’ll have to wait until March to find out if I get in anywhere.
Things I have not done?
Much work, any laundry, packing list for next trip (Wednesday), worked out, retained any sense of sanity.
December 16, 2008
Yes, Virginia…
Dear Santa,
I’ve been moderately good this year. In the grand scheme of years of bad decisions by quarterandchange this one didn’t hit the all time top 5. So there are some things I’d love to find Christmas morning, and I promise to be even better next year. Though I don’t promise to be tooooooo well behaved, because that would take this blog from boring to uber boring.
170 on the LSAT
This bracelet, and all that comes with it
Health and happiness for my family– after this year, they truly deserve it
The ability to figure out my weight in a healthy and non-disordered manner
Acceptance letter from:
Healthy babies and pregnancies for those that want them
A flask appropriate for baby showers
More time with:
Love,
QuarterandChange
December 9, 2008
Pause
I haven’t done anything remotely law school related since I arrived home from New Orleans. Ok, that’s not true, I googled how long it takes to get my LSAT scores five different times hoping I’d get an answer that was different than “3 WEEKS”. I did not.
I have to get my applications in before I leave for a Christmas trip with my family, and I’m stalling. My recommendations are in (YAY), I have a finalized list of schools to apply to, and yet I spent last night chatting on gmail and falling into bed at 7pm.
The fact that I’ll apply without my scores isn’t helping as it is making me second guess every choice on my reach, safety, and reasonable list. Two or three points can make the difference in reasonable and ridiculous, and it’s a tricky little game. At at least $75 a pop it’s also an incredibly expensive one.
Here it comes… doubt.
December 8, 2008
It’s O-V-A
At approximately 2pm on Saturday I put down my #2, stretched, and did the chair dance. It’s finally over… six months of studying, tutoring, hyper-focusing, and diagramming.
I can’t talk about what was on the test, or how much I hated a particular something that was on the test even though I tried my damnedest, but at some point maybe I’ll be able to.
Like once they publish this particular test to a book in the 10 Actual series. At which point I’ll be thirty and either practicing law or thinking, haha, remember that time I took the LSAT in New Orleans instead of getting wasted on Bourbon St drinking jager shots with some of my favorite guys? Either way, it’s going to be a while. Don’t worry, I’ve written my thoughts on the test down on a secret piece of paper which is safely tucked away in my memories box.
I will put this out there though– if you spend six months practicing reading comprehension with a pencil thinking the entire time that it would be so much freaking easier to do this if you were allowed to use a highlighter it’s probably worth taking five minutes to google if you can in fact use a highlighter. Because you can. And I easily could have stolen one from the office supply closet here if I had known that. So there’s my friendly LSAT tip for the day. Use a highlighter.
Also, if you think you’re going to have time to stop to buy a bottle of water to bring in to the test with you on the way there but you happen to be getting a ride to the test with one of the sweetest guys in the world you will not want to bother getting out of his truck to purchase said water bottle when you could be spending your last few minutes of freedom having your hand held. And then you’ll be constantly reminded of how inefficient water fountains are during the break.
Anyways, it’s done. Three weeks until scores. I was extremely excited that for the first time in six months I wouldn’t be carrying 25lbs of study guides in my luggage carry-on. I packed them carefully into my bag and attempted to check them. Which is when I found out that my overweight bag was going to cost an extra $150 bucks and had to remove all the books and carry them on regardless.
I have to admit I’m feeling a little post-LSAT depression. What am I supposed to do with all my free time now?
Oh yeah, get all my applications into law schools in the next 11 days. Never mind…
November 20, 2008
I’m Thankful
I’ll be heading across the pond shortly (no, that’s not going to get old) to hang out with the Golden Child for Thanksgiving so my Thankful post is coming a bit early. I’m not sure if I’ll have Internet access while in London and my posting may be sporadic or non-existent. I’m sure I’ll be updating from New Orleans between my crazy work schedule and final LSAT cramming (prepare yourselves for posts consisting entirely of curse words). Thanksgiving marks the time that things really began to fall apart last year, and so here is the list of things I’ve been grateful for in the past 12 months.
I’m Thankful For:
1. Not spending Thanksgiving feeling like my ovaries are being preemptively hijacked by in-laws as in years past
2. My loving and supportive family
3. My hilarious friends
4. The fact that I’ve made it through my first six months of singledom without catching some sort of communicable disease
5. That Izzi still seems to be alive and functioning and that I’ve thus far been able to provide for her, as much as a stretch as it has been
6. Friends who have been so generous to take care of Izzi while I’ve traveled for work or fun
7. That through it all my heart hasn’t been broken and is still intact, if not stronger
8. Memories that mean if the right song comes on I can close my eyes and immediately go back to a lazy Sunday on a sunny boat anchored off the coast of a Floridian island
9. For the men that have shaped the past year, in good ways and bad. At least they’re closed chapters
10. For the men that will forever be open chapters and that give me hope for the gender: my father, the Golden Child, and Will
11. Getting the apparent blessedly shallow end of the crazy gene pool
12. My freedom
13. Peanut Butter Pretzel Cliff bars
14. My newfound love of beer, which makes social situations more versatile and way more fun
15. Falling in love with new cities
16. Endless possibilities
17. Barre class
18. Getting custody of the wine fridge and the coffee maker
19. Great health insurance
20. Early release Fridays
21. My LSAT tutor. Yes, seriously
22. Stable employment
November 5, 2008
Gah
I’m going to do my best not to delve deeply into politics here, since it seems every single area of my life has become a political conversational landmine. I’ll just say that I’m hopeful, thankful that women still have control over their own decisions about their own bodies, and wearing my big girl boots.
Studying or stressing about applications and LSATs has pretty much become my MO. If I’m not studying, I’m at the gym, babysitting, or slumped in my desk chair at work wishing desperately that I could be studying. I’ll be traveling for about nineteen days before the LSAT, and I’d love to have more time to grab all the points that I can. Oh, and start applications. Yeah, about that. Add to the list? Stalking LSAC to see what transcripts and recs have come in.
I’d love to describe at length the fact that I’ve been unable to sleep through a full night in eight weeks or that I have to go have my TB test looked at in a few hours (um, gross) but I think that may just alienate the few readers I have left. So, hey, let’s look back on the days when I used to date and have sex rather than focus on the days when the closest I’ve been to a man is having him swear into my arm while trying unsuccessfully to get my blood sample.
Quarterlife Crisis 